No One Wants a Large Miss Universe

It's so cliché to say "It's 2017, why is this still an issue?" But that is just the case for the topic of a woman that is not the "standard" size of society to do great things. I have not been watching the Miss Universe Pageant, but I did come across a lot of articles on the obsession people have about Miss Canada's size. Lets be very clear! Miss Canada, Siera Bearchell, is far from overweight. However compared to all the other pageant women that are typically thin she does have a larger frame.


Siera has not always been the size she is right now. At Miss Supranational 2015 Bearchell was slim like her counterparts. When asked about her weight gain in an interview she stated:

"This competition is more than what we look like. It's about being comfortable with who we are, it's about sharing a message that is important to us."

The Top 6 Misconceptions of Plus Size Women

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and shared things you have done or wore and they seemed surprised. Although we live normal lives, there are some people that believe our lives are anything but like theirs. I have complied the top 6 misconceptions of plus size women. Can you relate????

#1 Plus size women are lazy....

Most plus size women are not lazy. We enjoy getting out of the house and doing activities. Just because we are overweight does not mean we sit on the couch all day.

#2 Plus size women are totally unhealthy and near death lol

While I do understand some risk factors with our health, not all plus size women are having health issues. It is very possible to be over 200 pounds and still live a healthy lifestyle.

Top 5 Reasons Why All You Need Is Yourself

We live in a world where everyone is seeking someone's approval. We grow up pleasing our parents and wanting to do things that makes them proud of us. That then moves on to being recognized by your employer. Our friends hold a great weight in guiding us to make the best choices collectively. And lets not forget with the rise in social media we seek greatness from people we don't even know. But, why is that? Why do we often find ourselves torn between who we want to be and who they may want us to be.


I wanted to share the top 5 tips on what you can do to embrace and be yourself regardless of what others think...


1. Welcome suggestions, criticism, and opinions BUT only use them as tools not as your decisions. Lets be honest we all need a little guidance sometimes but let it be guidance not your final decision.


2. If you want to discuss a topic with someone that you already know doesn't agree with it... DON'T! Talking to someone about something when you already know there stance on it is pointless. This just lets to discussions or arguments with no resolution so don't waste your time.

Will I Ever Find True Love at This Weight???

I ask myself this question from time to time. Will I ever find true love at this weight? Sometimes when I ask myself that I have to just laugh. I'm not sure about some of you but I think I am a great catch LOL. So heck yes I know I am worth the true love I desire. However, why do I feel like it might not happen for me at the size I am. I see many big women who are in loving relationships which reminds m that it is possible. What I have learned that it is not the fact that I think my weight is keeping me from having a man. It is the insecurities I have about my weight that is trickling into my want of a relationship.


When we want something, regardless of what it is, we can often be our worst critic. When you find yourself doubting a situation that is the time to dissect why you are feeling that way. Below I have a few tips on what I do to help in that area to feel better about plus size dating...

How Do You Love Your Body BUT You Want to Lose Weight

I've came across a few things that this topic came up. Typically it's a large woman that is either trying to or has lost weight and is getting negative comments from others. What's more surprising is that the negative comments comes from other big women or men. You know it's kind of crazy to me to see others putting someone down for making changes to their own body. I have never received negative comments about losing weight. The most I have heard is not to lose too much. That is stupid too! I think because those who are receiving backlash are people who are more known basically celebrities in their own right and have a large following.

The Excuses of The Big Girl

I have had a some great things going on that has taken up a lot of my time but I had to get back to you guys. I recently did some things with a few other plus size people that has made me feel some type of way being a big girl myself. That would be excuses from people who are of larger sizes. I have had my moments of when I didn't want to do things or I was scared to try things, but I have never functioned in a way of having excuses for everything. This actually bothers me.


Being a larger size I am all too familiar with having difficulties in certain areas. I have knee issues that makes it very tough to do a lot of things. Not to mention just being a larger size I have more to move around specially when it comes to working out or dancing. I also I have health issues that makes it hard for me to do things, so I get it. What I will not do is make my size be my excuse.

Top 3 Tips to Self Confidence

There is no doubt my self confidence fluctuates from time to time depending on where I am in my life. Currently I am not myself in regards to how I feel about myself in certain areas. Like many stress, anxiety, and other factors plays a major role on how you feel about yourself. Below I wanted to share the top three things I do to keep my confidence level up or at least try to get in a better head space.

1. Write yourself reminders. I have post it notes everywhere, especially on mirrors. Find an object that you will look at frequently like mirrors, doors, computer, phone, and etc. You will have no choice but to read the message when you look at that object.

You Are The Most Important Person In Your Life

I received an email yesterday and at the bottom of it that is exactly what it said. "You are the most important person in your life." I read it again and again.....and again. When I think about 2014, I am not pleased with a lot of things. I repeat all of the should've, could've, would've and you know what? I don't get upset like I used to. There are a ton of things I could have changed or avoided this year but then would I be this strong right now?

I firmly believe in what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I am strong because I remember where I came from and what I went through. As 2015 is approaching quickly (Xmas is 14 days away...yay), I am excited to start a new and fresh year, but I am also scared of the unknowns. We never know what will happen in our lives until it happens. Should we worry about though?????

Top 5 Mistakes Plus Size Women Make in Fashion

Being a proclaimed fashionista is awesome as style sees no size and every one's type of style varies by the individual. When looking for that killer look that will turn heads or get tons of like on social media sometimes these fabulous curvy ladies can go a little too far to the left. Find out the top 5 mistakes women make and how to improve on it.

1. Not buying the right size
   
This is a very common mistake women make. It is tough to find trendy clothing in larger sizes specially women over a size 2x or 22. Always make sure to check for a few things: make sure your buttons are not pulling the material. Your fabric should lad flat and smooth. If the waist of your pants is digging into you stomach, they are to small. If your fabric stretches to the point it becomes see through, than it is too small.

2. Do not always dress age appropriate

Majority of trendy plus size fashions in stores are junior plus sizes. We must remember that even thought that top and leggings are cute, you may be a little to old to wear it. It is nice to find and wear cool prints, but just make sure they are appropriate for the occasion.

3. Believe a girdle(spanx) will fix everything

Girdles are made to smooth your rolls and pull you in a little, however, they are not miracle workers. Having a foundation piece is great for wearing bodycon dresses and to just smooth you out and enhance your curves.

4. Not mix and matching prints and colors properly

There is a right and wrong way to mix and match prints and colors. Sometimes women can do too much and end up looking like a Christmas tree. Understand that less is more and although mixing and matching can be show stopping when done properly, there is fine line when you can go to far.

5. Being too insecure to wear fabulous fashions

Body image issues keeps many women from dressing to their highest potential. They follow too many fashion rules which hinders the possibility of truly looking your best. Not all fashion rules are meant to be followed. Your style should tell what type of person you are without you having to speak.

The only fashion rules you should follow are ones that will bring out your inner fabulousness. Remember not everything is meant for everyone so be aware of how you look in certain items to make sure you look your best!

20 Ways to Love Your Body

1. Think of your body as the vehicle to your dreams. Honor it. Respect it. Fuel it.

2. Create a list of all the things your body lets you do. Read it and add to it often.

3. Become aware of what your body can do each day. Remember it is the instrument of your life, not just an ornament.

4. Create a list of people you admire: people who have contributed to your life, your community, or the world. Consider whether their appearance was important to their success and accomplishments.

5. Walk with your head held high, supported by pride and confidence in yourself as a person.

6. Don’t let your weight or shape keep you from activities that you enjoy.

7. Wear comfortable clothes that you like, that express your personal style, and that feel good to your

body.

8. Count your blessings, not your blemishes.

9. Think about all the things you could accomplish with the time and energy you currently spend

worrying about your body and appearance. Try one!

10. Be your body’s friend and supporter, not its enemy.

11. Consider this: your skin replaces itself once a month, your stomach lining every five days, your liver every six weeks, and your skeleton every three months. Your body is extraordinary--begin to respect and appreciate it.

12. Every morning when you wake up, thank your body for resting and rejuvenating itself so you can

enjoy the day.

13. Every evening when you go to bed, tell your body how much you appreciate what it has allowed you to do throughout the day.

14. Find a method of exercise that you enjoy and do it regularly. Don’t exercise to lose weight or to fight your body. Do it to make your body healthy and strong and because it makes you feel good. Exercise for the Three F’s: Fun, Fitness, and Friendship.

15. Think back to a time in your life when you felt good about your body. Tell yourself you can feel like that again, even in this body at this age.

16. Keep a list of 10 positive things about yourself--without mentioning your appearance. Add to it!

17. Put a sign on each of your mirrors saying, “I’m beautiful inside and out.”

18. Choose to find the beauty in the world and in yourself.

19. Start saying to yourself, “Life is too short to waste my time hating my body this way.”

20. Eat when you are hungry. Rest when you are tired. Surround yourself with people that remind you of your inner strength and beauty.

Don’t Weigh Your Self-Esteem. It’s What’s Inside That Counts!

Compiled by Margo Maine, Ph.D.

Challenge Accepted....100 Days of Happiness

I can not tell you guys how crazy my life has been since May. Although this year started off  in more amazing ways than I can describe, my life took a drastic change going into May. Since then I have been slowly picking up the pieces of my life but I can't lie; it has been extremely difficult.

I love to share my life journey with you guys to show you I am not immune to life struggles and to reach those who are in need of someone to help them through theirs. Constantly telling myself what I need to do but never executing it is a big thing for me. Lately I have found myself doing that a lot due to the stress and other factors in my life.

At some point you have to grab life by the horns and get into gear to achieve the life you want to have. That is what I am doing starting today. There are a few things I am putting in place to help me along my journey. The major things I want to focus on is handling my stress/frustration/anger, my weight/overall health, and certain areas in my business.

There a few things I plan to do to that. I plan to write in a journal, update my vision boards in my room, pray and read my bible, and the last thing is something I thought can be fun is taking the 100happydays challenge. I have a few friends that are currently doing it and I wanted to see if it cant help me get out of this funk I am in.

I think something like this is great for people who want to improve on the way they think about certain aspects in their lives. So if you have body image issues, financial issues, relationship issues or any other thing you might be going through, you should give this challenge a try. You can sign up HERE and get started which ever day you chose. I hope this will help you on your journey. Follow my instagram @sizefabulous to see my daily challenge post.

Let me know if you sign up and we can stay in touch throughout the journey!!!!!

MLB Star Prince Fielder Nude...Que The Outrage

Now y'all know anytime a big person does something out of the ordinary (of small minded people) the outrage rings in heavy, even for Texas Ranger's star Prince Fielder.

ESPN is releasing their annual Body Issue and they have seemed to feature people they usually would not. While we are used to seeing the industry standard chiseled and toned athlete, this year we are getting everything from the 77 year old golfer Gary Player to the pregnant volleyball player Kerri Walsh Jennings. However it's the 275 pound Fielder that is causing the uproar.

You would think that a PRO ATHELTE that brings in multi-million dollar contracts would no have need to defend himself to the critics. After all, if he wasn't in good enough shape how would he be able to preform on a daily basis for a professional team. Yet he is still left with negative comments because of his body type...SMH

Knowing that he is not the average size of a MLB player he told ESPN:

"You don’t have to look like an Under Armour mannequin to be an athlete. A lot of people probably think I'm not athletic or don't even try to work out or whatever, but I do. Just because you're big doesn't mean you can't be an athlete. And just because you work out doesn't mean you're going to have a 12-pack. I work out to make sure I can do my job to the best of my ability. Other than that, I'm not going up there trying to be a fitness model."

It kills me that something that is so positive is torn down just because it is not the ideal image of some. So instead of congratulating him on his confidence and amazing career, not to mention how fine he is LOL, people take one look at his naked body and share their hurtful words. What a shame!

I have to applaud Prince and ESPN for stepping out side the box and showing love to those who don't fit the industry mold.  I totally encourage more outlets to feature more individuals which will then lead to a change in what many see as normal.

Meanwhile lets take another look at his amazing shoot!

Stop Avoiding the Dressing Room

How often do we go to the dressing room to try on that uber cute pair of jeans only to be disappointed that they don't fit. For many women it's no problem they don't fit but for some it can be a devastating and confidence killing moment. Either you gained weight or the designer cut of the item does not fit you properly and you feel like it's all your fault you can't find cute clothes. Situations like these have kept many women from going into physical store locations and enjoying the shopping experience. I feel everyone should enjoy the sopping experience so I have listed a few things you can do to be a more confident shopper specially when you have to go to the dressing room.

~ GET YOUR SIZE!!!!!!!! I can not tell you how much this is important. Many women try to squeeze into items that is just not their size only to get upset when it doesn't fit.

~ Get additional sizes of the same item. Certain designer cuts run very different so if possible get a few sizes of the same item to see which one will fit you best.

~ Bring a few options in just in case. Just in case if that item doesn't fit have some alternatives to try on.

~ Know what fabrics will work best with the sizes you choose. You should be aware of what will give you more stretch when you need it and vice versa.

~ Have a back up store. Always have a store you can go to that you know will have things you can find in your correct size for whatever occasion you are shopping for.

These are few rules I go by when I shop and it helps me avoid the dressing room meltdown.

Hopefully they will help you to!!!!!!

True Life: My Boyfriend is Fed Up with My Weight.....Womp Womp

I love watching MTV's True Life and more often than not many people can relate to what the people are going through in their episode. True Life has been flying under the radar lately, probably because of ratings, so I've found that new episodes come on very randomly and very late. Well that's the only time I tend to catch them. Last night's episode featured two couples in which the women are facing weight loss battles to save their relationship and each couple got me upset in different ways.

The first couple consisted of a very fit man and an overweight woman. The man was very into fitness and healthy eating and the woman wasn't. She was like the average big girl who enjoyed her food and did little physical activity. With her boyfriend constantly on her case about loosing weight she obliged but it didn't come without added relationship issues. This is when I started to give my major side eye... I was all for encouraging her to live a healthier lifestyle but it was the way he went about it. Like many (for reasons I will never understand since it never works) thought by calling her names, giving her ultimatums, and damn near forcing her to workout and eat the way he did would give her the motivation to lose weight. Why, Why, Why do people do this!!!!!!! It never works and usually brings on negative results. My whole thought during the show was why is he with her if he wants a smaller framed woman and why is she with him when he talks to her that way. I absolutely can not deal with women regardless of size that stays in a relationship when someone puts you down constantly. That is not and will NEVER be love. This young lady deserves better and hopefully in time she will and if SHE wants to lose weight for HERSELF I am more than proud she is making it happen. We just have to remember why we are doing things and it should always be because we want to do it for ourselves and through our own journey.

Now on to the other couple.....Major side eye from the beginning. There is a slightly over weight guy and a severely obese woman. What got me upset about this couple is that the man simply wanted his girlfriend to become healthier. He didn't want her to be a size two, he just wanted her to get down to a healthier weight due to the medical conditions she has and she was straight up being lazy and not seeing the severity of her situation. After miscarriages due to her size and other medical problems she still did not take her weight seriously. Now as much as I preach to love your body I also preach living a healthy lifestyle regardless of your size. It wasn't until she became pregnant AGAIN and her boyfriend left her (because of the burden she became due to her constant weight gain and unwillingness to do better) that she understood she had to take her weight seriously and do something about it. It killed me to see her killing herself. I thought her confidence was awesome but regardless of your size you should always work towards making healthy life choices to live a long life. There was no doubt that had she not gotten pregnant and her boyfriend stayed she would still be gaining weight and that's sad. He had to help her put her shoes on and tie them for her and she told him  he would be doing more for her in the near future. Now how selfish is that!!!!! By the end of the show she had a healthy baby and was embracing eating better and exercising and looking into getting weight loss surgery.

This episode hit many spots with me and my own weight loss journey/struggle LOL. Everyone has a choice of how they see their life and what they would like to do in it. First and foremost always focus on your health and secondly make sure your choices are for you. You have to love yourself before you make your changes or your changes will mean nothing.

Thanks for letting me vent LOL.....

Big Women, Sex, and....The Problem

I was reading an article a friend shared on Facebook about a plus size woman having unprotected sex in fear that she couldn't not keep men any other way. It was a great article and one particular passage hit home for me...

"I really thought about where this sister was coming from. Being a single, full-figured diva myself, I understand the struggle. It’s real in these dating streets. We live in a world where a size 2 has a better chance of getting a date on a Friday night than a size 22. Men are visual creatures, and no matter how great your personality is, they all want a certain “type”. "

Oh how I know this feeling to well. Since I was in high school and actively dating, I went through and understand what that woman was coming from. It took a while for me to develop the confidence and self-esteem I have so in the beginning I was also a beggars cant be choosers type of girl. Now, I wasn't as careless as that young woman in regards to always having unprotected sex, but there were situations when I felt pressured and gave in.

Fat-shaming is real and it happens at any age which can lead people to do things they shouldn't and wouldn't normally do. It takes time to build confidence and self-esteem when you have felt so low about yourself. It can be a daily struggle to learn to accept and love yourself and your body regardless of your size. Not to mention the countless reminders we get daily about how we need to lose weight. The author gave great advise throughout the article and this was my favorite...

"But my most important message to her and all my Big Girls is this: no one will love you unless you love yourself. Yes, there are some “Shallow Hal’s” out there who will reject you at first glance. But most people are attracted to confidence. Wearing confidence and self-love is better than make-up, designer clothes, or a new hairstyle … it’s even better than Spanx. Heck, I can’t think of too many things better than Spanx! When you go out there fully armored with self-love and confidence, you’ll attract the guy you’re supposed to have."

Ladies never think and treat yourself like you are less than. You deserve nothing but the best and respect and always remember that.

The Rebirth

I am beyond sorry for not keeping up with my ootd post. All I can say is LIFE has taken me on a few new and unexpected journeys but I am getting things back on track. Sooooo lets get down to business!

I am calling this period in my life "The Rebirth"... I am moving down a different journey and I have a new found freedom that I am learning to love and just want to embrace and step things up a bit. 

This is a dress from my boutique and you don't want to miss out on our hot items. Get your dress today and so much more at www.sizefabulousboutique.com

No Limitations on Your Body!!

I always like to share videos that shows plus size women having fun while dancing and showing others that they are not letting their size get in the way of them having fun and doing something they love. Confidence is key and never let your size put limitations on your body. Don't be scared to let your hair down and have a little fun. It also keeps you active and we all need to be a little active. Check out these ladies getting it in!!!!

My 6 Goals of 2014

I didn't plan on sharing my resolutions, but I changed my mind. Size Fabulous and myself has come such a long way in 2013 and I only see great things from here. My list includes personal and business related resolutions so let's get started.

 

I only have 3 really big personal resolutions:

• I want to wear make up more often. I am so busy getting 3 little ones and myself ready in the morning that I don't care to even go near makeup. I want that to change, I want to at least wear lipstick and eye shadow on the regular.
• Create more time to exercise regularly. Again my schedule is so busy, most days I don't want to do jack but relax on my down time.
• Don't give into temptation in regards to food. I work so hard to eat healthy most of the time, but I fall for temptation very easily. I have to do better!

 

Now on to my 3 business resolutions:

• Focus more on building my actual business clientele
• Have my very first Size Fabulous event
• Grow my Chloe & Isabel jewelry business

 

I am not real big on making crazy resolutions. I just want to focus on what I find to be very important to me and what will help my grow as a woman and business.

 

Have you written down your resolutions yet?????

Everyone is NOT Fat Shamming You!!!

I am pretty sure you have heard about the mom of 3, Maria King, and her fitness photo. Here photo has now gone viral because many believe she is fat shaming. I completely disagree!

I understand what it's like to be a busy mom of 3 with 2 jobs (one of which I own). I have a 4 year old, 2 year old twins. I work over 40 hours a week. I handle all of the cooking and I do most of the cleaning and preparing for the next day, not to mention I don't like to miss my fav shows. I used to use how busy I was as an excuse to not be very healthy.

I am not saying you can't be overweight and healthy because I have never had any issues because of my weight. I got to a point after my first daughter that I wanted to lose weight and get more healthy and fit. It has been a roller coaster especially since I had my twins. I have way less time to dedicate to fitness BUT I make it happen. I believe Maria's photo was meant for those who want to be healthier and more fit but let their excuses get in the way.

 Everyone that sends out messages are not attacking others. Now there are times when people do send out messages and pictures to shames others. Wee see that everyday, but I don't agree that this is one of them. I feel those who were offended have their own insecurities within themselves that this picture struck a cord with. I could understand if she had including other things in her statement that where very offensive but to simply say what's your excuse can be targeted toward everyone, not just overweight women.

I hate when people are quick to judge without knowing the other person's situation. Maria shares that she suffered from bulimia in the past along with other things about herself which lets me know that she has had her own struggles but did not use them as an excuse.

At times I feel some plus size women get to emotional to fast and are quick to yell fat shaming without looking further into things. There are also a lot of plus size women who don't realize they thin shame women. How many post have you seen of bigger women putting down skinny women? It is all the same thing people.

Yes fat people get shamed often, HOWEVER, not everyone is fat shaming you. We need to work on our sensitivity to subjects before we jump to a conclusion.

You all know I love you ladies and I am sorry if you disagree with me (everyone is entitled to their own opinion). I hope Maria King's photo did not offend you and if it did I am sorry. Always remember you are fabulous, amazing, and beautiful women.

What Journey Are You Choosing??

So Size Fabulous serves a set purpose focusing on certain things. I often find myself looking at other people to compare what I'm doing to what they are doing, especially if they are more known in the industry. Then I snap out of it and I remember why I am doing what I am doing. I am reaching goals for myself. I have a set story I am trying to tell that includes none other than myself.

I say that to say this, comparing yourself to others will never get you anywhere. Focus on your own goals, your own story and you will be happy you did in the end. You are amazing and you are still writing your story, never let anyone steal your joy!!!