Look of The Week

Spring if definitely here and floral prints are a big trend this year. Another fashion trend that has came back is the chunky heel. I love chunky heels. For me they provide more stability and can be more comfortable. Straps are hot right now too. Simple straps on shoes give a very chic look to any look you are putting together. How do you feel about the look of the week???

Sheer Floral Print Tom from Dots at $19.80
Black Pencil Tube Skirt from Asos Curves at $16.61
Miss July-Orange Sandals from Lola Shoetique at $48.00

Weight Loss Doesn't Help Girls' Self-Esteem

After overweight teenage girls win the battle with the scale, an even longer struggle may begin with the mirror, says a new study. Researchers at Purdue University found that weight loss does not guarantee that girls are going to feel better about themselves and their bodies, most likely because of the negative stereotypes and messages about obesity they encounter.

The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that 17 percent of American children ages 2 to 19 are currently obese. Since 1980, obesity rates among children and teenagers have almost tripled.

"We found that obese black and white teenage girls who transitioned out of obesity continued to see themselves as fat, despite changes in their relative body mass," said Sarah A. Mustillo, a PhD and lead researcher on the study in arelease. "Further, obese white girls had lower self-esteemthan their normal-weight peers and their self-esteem remained flat even as they transitioned out of obesity."

For the study, researchers reviewed data from the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute Growth and Health Study, which followed the weight of more than 2,000 black and white girls for 10 years, starting at ages 9 or 10. Based on their body trends, the girls were classified into three groups: normal weight, transitioned out of obesity, and chronically obese.

While self-esteem for the black girls transitioning from the obese to the normal-weight range did rebound, both races still had poor body image after weight loss. Researchers noted that the self-esteem for black girls was lower overall to begin with, and that mental health assistance during weight loss might be the key to rebounding every dieter’s body image.

“Understanding and addressing body image, identity and self-esteem issues could ultimately help keep the weight off,” Mustillo said in the same release. “Why keep dieting and exercising if you are still going to see yourself as fat?”

Helping teen girls boost their self-esteem can be tricky, but there are some simple strategies parents can try. If you think your teen needs a body image boost, try these strategies from the Mayo Clinic.

• Discuss self-image. Mayo Clinic experts say it’s important to talk to teen girls about body image and emphasize that different women have different body types. Ask her what she likes about herself, and explain what you like about her, too. When you’re discussing body image with your teen, use positive language, and avoid talking about “fat” or “thin.”
• Counter negative media messages. Because teens are constantly inundated with messages about body image from advertisements, the Internet, their peers, and more, encourage her to ask questions about what she sees. Point out examples of women who are famous for their achievements, not their appearances, to set a positive example, experts say.
• Praise achievements. Highlight your daughter’s special skills, efforts, and achievements, and emphasize that exercising her talents, whatever they may be, is more important than her appearance.
• Encourage healthy habits. Set a positive example for eating and exercising, and stress that you eat well and workout for your health, not just to look a certain way. Offer healthy meals and snacks at home, and involve your children in the process of selecting healthy foods.

Courtesy of www.everydayhealth.com

Full Figured, Fabulous & Dating Part 5: What to Do After the Date

Your actions after your date are just as important as your actions on your date. Even if your date went really well, it can be overshadowed by what you do or try to do after it. I will touch on what to do after a good date and what to do after a bad date. These tips should help you finish strong.

After a Good Date

• Before you part ways let them know you had a great time on your date and wait and listen to his opinion.
• If he advise he would like to see you again you can agree to it BUT do not try to make plans right at that moment.
• NO SEX on the first date. You want to take your time and get to know him and sex can sometimes complicate things.
• Do not call or text him that night after you part ways. If he texts or calls you then it is ok to engage in conversation.
• Do not push him for another date. Let things flow and take your time.

After a Bad Date

• DO NOT lead him on. If you don't want to continue dating or speak with him after your date, you have to cut all ties.
• Be honest and tell him you are not interested. If you are not comfortable saying it on the date it is ok to send him a message after you are home.

First dates are the most nervous yet exciting dates. Possibilities are endless of how the date will end. Remember every factor of your date is important. Take your time to make sure you are presenting yourself the way you want to be treated. Never allow yourself to be pressured into anything and ALWAYS make safe decisions. Relax and let things flow without being forceful. You deserve the best so never settle for less.

The Pressure to Love Your Body

As many people that are telling you to lose weight and be skinny there are just as many people that are telling you to love your body. It can feel like you are being pressured equally by both sides and confused as to which way to go. I am a firm believer in loving yourself and your body, however, I understand that it can be extremely hard to do so for some. What you must understand is that you didn't wake up one day hating yourself, it happened over time and the same will happen for you to love yourself.

Everyday is an opportunity to take another step toward loving your body. Here is a few things you can do to help you on your journey to a more positive body image.

• Every morning look in a mirror and tell yourself you are beautiful.
• Write body positive affirmations in places you look at regularly.
• Follow body positive blogs, twitters and facebook pages.
• Distance yourself from negative people as much as possible.
• Look in a mirror naked often to understand your body more.

These tips can help you take those steps to a happier you. Remember it may not happen over night and that is ok. Just take it one day at a time and everything will fall into place.

Full Figured, Fabulous & Dating Part 4: Do's and Dont's When on a Date

Many people, women and men, think some of the smallest things wouldn't affect a date, but it does. After your search for a date, the outfit, and finally picking the location it is time to actually venture out on the date. Read the do's and dont's to help you have a successful date.

Do's

• Arrive on time. Being late is very rude and inconsiderate. I do understand that emergencies happen but your date should be informed if that occurs.
• Dress appropriate for your date. It will be very uncomfortable for your date if you are dress like you are going somewhere else.
• Engage in conversation. Nothing is more awkward than silence on the first date. Get to know each other by asking questions and allowing him to learn about you as well.
• BE YOURSELF, let him get to know you for who you are. Relax and let things flow.
• End the date on your terms. You don't have to kiss, go home with him, or anything else you don't want to do.

Don'ts

• Never talk about sex. Sex should never be a topic when on a first date. It gives the impression that you may want to do something after the date.
• Never talk about past relationships. It is EXTREMELY awkward to listen to someone your interested in talk about an ex.
• Don't order the salad. Ordering a salad to give the illusion you don't eat much is silly. If you want a steak, order one.
• No negative body talk. Making jokes about your body will not make light of the date (No pun intended) You want him to respect your body so you have to lead by example.
• Don't allow yourself to feel pressured to do anything you don't want to do.

Of course not all dates will be perfect, but these tips can help you have a great date. Leave him wanting more.

**Look out for Part 5: The follow up after the date next Friday**

Body Image Roundtable with Rapper Eve

I love when women in the industry, be it music or movie, can come together and discuss there own body image issues and help other women and teens through theirs. We tend to forget that stars are people too and they go through the same struggles we do. Always remember to never compare yourself to others because it will only hurt you in the long run. Check out this amazing roundtable of women on body image.

Is the Key to Losing Weight Not Trying To Lose Weight? A New Study Gives Some Clues

It seems counterintuitive, but according to a new study by Stanford University researchers, the key to long-lasting weight loss is may be learn the keys to maintenance before trying to lose weight.

In the study titled “Promoting Healthy Weight with ‘Stability Skills First,” Michaela Kiernan and her colleagues found that people are more able to attain lasting weight loss if they are first taught to maintain it.

Fit Sugar gives more details about the study:

In a new study by Stanford scientists, more than 260 overweight to obese women were split into two groups: One immediately began a 20-week weight-loss plan that involved eating more fruits and veggies, being more active, keeping daily food journals, and attending weekly support meetings. Once this part of the program was completed, they spent eight more weeks focusing on weight maintenance tactics.
The other group was asked to refrain from losing any weight the first eight weeks while they learned those maintenance lessons. Only after those two months did these women began the identical 20-week weight-loss program.
In the end, both groups lost about the same amount of weight—an average 17 pounds, roughly 9 percent of their starting weights. But there was a big difference a year later: Those who lost weight first regained seven pounds, more than twice as much as the women who started by mastering the maintenance tricks.

These findings may be just what people need to finally lose the weight and keep it off. While most concentrate on losing the weight, no matter what, only to find the pounds creep back on, these participants were able to maintain their weight loss because they learned the tools necessary to live a healthy life, not just get thinner.

Courtesy of www.frugivoremag.com

Full Figured, Fabulous & Dating Part 3: Best Places for a Date

Part 1 and 2 tackled the most important rules before the date. Now it's time to focus on the actual date. Where you go on your date is just as important as what you wear.

• Restaurants are the usual go to place when on a date. You want to make sure it has nice lighting and the noise level is ok. You want to be able to hear him when you engage in conversation and be able to see him clearly.
• Home dates are an absolutely no no for the first date. Mainly because you don't know this person and it can be dangerous. You also don't want him to get the impression that sex is after dinner. I recommend staying away from home dates until you have been dating for a while.
• Clubs can be tricky. Night clubs are a no for the first date. That is just unacceptable for you to go to a night club as a date. BUT comedy clubs and other venues that are doing shows can be a good date. Although you wont be able to carry on an intimate conversation, you get to enjoy similar interest you have. It can also alleviate some of the pressure of the date.
• Activity first dates are not a good look. Things like put put golf, bowling, movies, go carts and other similar activities are NOT first dates. We are not 16 anymore. It's time to grow up and go on grown up dates.
• Special occasion events like being invited to a company event can be good and bad. It's good because you get to meet and speak with people your date is around daily so you get to see them in their normal state. It could also be bad because you don't have the opportunity to intimately get to know them and their colleagues may ask you a million questions.

Remember first dates are very important and where you go on the date is just as important. We are all grown so our dates should show our maturity level. Always remember safety when meeting someone for the first time. It is also very important to give your date's information to someone you know just in case if anything happens.


**Stick around for Full Figured, Fabulous & Dating Part 4: How to Act on Your Date next Friday**

Start With You!!!!!!

Everything that goes on in your life starts with you. Every change that is made starts with you. Why would you want someone else to make any decisions for you. Think to yourself, what do YOU want to do, say or change about yourself. Then ask yourself what are you waiting for?

Changing the way you think can help build your confidence and improve your self esteem. Having control can make you feel powerful. I know it does for me. I can admit that it may be a little scary to do something out of your normal day to day but changes can't be made without you. I'm still nervous venturing out and creating my brand and business but I know this is what I want and I have to go for it. Even if you fail AT LEAST YOU TRIED. Never allow yourself to say the should've, could've, would've.

If you want to change your wardrobe, then do it. Trying out things you've never worn before can actually make you love how beautiful you really are. It can help you appreciate and love your body. I recently started wearing eye make up and I was amazed at how it made me feel. Just remember when buying new clothes to make sure you by clothes that fit and complements your frame.

If Losing weight is what you want to do then do it. The first thing is to make sure your losing for the right reasons. Yes we all love our curves but we have to remember to be healthy. I'm on a weight loss journey as well so I cant relate to all of you. Remember to take it easy nothing happens over night.

I just want all of you to start doing everything you are scared to do. Don't let anyone stop you from your dreams because of you size, including yourself. Sometimes people can stand in their own way and that's what we need to overcome. Again I cant say it enough that nothing will change in your life without you making and committing to those changes.

Good luck on your journey :)

There are No Bad Bodies

ALL BODIES ARE GOOD BODIES.

There are no bad bodies. The concept of “bad bodies” is a conspiracy.

On average, women see over 400 advertisements a day with glamorized images of what they should look like.

You know what all those images have in common?

They are selling something. Make up, a gym membership, clothes, hair products, restaurants, diet plans, razors, plastic surgery, etc.

There is a reason this ideal exists. It’s to make money. There is a reason that thin has been so culturally accepted as the way to have a “good” body. There is a reason that the beauty ideal - thin frame, even round breasts, long legs, smooth skin, long sleek hair, perfect complexion, made up, and wearing a certain style of clothing - exist for a reason.

The reason, is that if corporations can manage to convince women that they aren’t beautiful the way they are, they can convince them that they need certain things to make them beautiful.

Like diet pills and diet food and a gym membership and make up and cover up and nail polish and spanx and fancy clothes and more and more and more.

It is a conspiracy to make money.

And it’s one of the most successful conspiracies in the world.

You know what else those ads all have in common? They show those women as being happy and successful; having friends, going to parties, having men desiring them, being confident, smooth, and popular. This had led to an abundance of women who deeply believe, consciously or not, that the only way to achieve happiness, is to achieve a certain aesthetic.

It’s not just the media. because this has been so widely spread, and accepted, you hear it everywhere. from your peers, your parents, your teachers, even strangers.

IT’S. NOT. TRUE.

Bodies have become such a taboo, and such a subject of shame for most women, that girls don’t grow up seeing real women’s bodies. Not represented by the media, and not even represented by the women in their lives. I think it’s pretty rare for a girl to grow up seeing all different shapes and sizes of women being represented proudly, and not in the context of “look how disgusting this part of me is.”

So who do they look to, to try to understand what women should look like?

Magazines, TV commercials, etc etc.

So they think that’s what all people should look like. So of COURSE they feel like something is wrong with them. Of course they do.

But there isn’t. There is nothing wrong with you.

The part of your body that you think is just *wrong*, and *deformed*, and *hideous.* Why? Your body is built exactly the way it’s meant to be. It’s your body. And anybody who tries to tell you there is something inherently bad about it is brainwashed.

There are no bad bodies. There are only bodies that are well taken care of, and bodies that are not. If you eat food that makes you feel good, and do things that make your body feel good, then your body will find the weight, the size, and the shape that is best for it.

That might be 90 pounds. 120 pounds. 180 pounds. 250 pounds. More or less. Anything.

So maybe, next time you’re sitting there just thinking about how fat, and ugly, and wrong you are, take a second to ask yourself, why do I think that?

The reason is, because you have been programmed to think that. You have grown up in a toxic environment, where that concept - the concept of good and bad bodies - is everywhere. And just knowing that won’t make those thoughts go away, but maybe, it will give you more perspective. Maybe then you can step back, and say, “okay. this isn’t real. This is actually complete and utter f*cking bullsh*t.”

Your body is a good body.

Your body is the perfect body.

Article courtesy of www.theplumpinay.com

Full Figured, Fabulous & Dating Part 2: What to Wear

Nothing is more annoying than tearing my closet apart looking for the perfect outfit. Whether it's going to work or hanging out with friends, I end up with a major clean up on isle 6 in my room. When it comes to dating you have to be very particular and careful about what you wear.

The first thing to consider when looking for your prefect outfit is where are you going. Dressing for the occasion is a must. How embarrassing is it to be dressed down or to formal for a date that is completely the opposite. I remember watching a reality show and the guy asked the girl to hang out. She misinterpreted it as it being a date and showed up dressed to the nines. He on the other hand had on jeans and a flannel shirt....SMH. So before you pull out your ball gown understand what type of date are you going on.

The next thing is dress comfortably. Regardless of where your date is make sure you are comfortable. If you have to put on 4 spanx, the outfit is not for you. You should not get light headed and be about to pass out because you have been holding your breathe since 8 o'clock. On the chance you do want to add things like breast/butt enhancers or spanx, make sure they are secured and appropriately covered. For the women with large breast keep an eye on button up tops. Make sure they are not struggling to stay closed. For women with larger butts should make sure your pants are not showing any crack. Also the length of your dress should not end at your private area.

Speaking about private areas the most important thing is dressing appropriate in general. It is ok to have a top that shows a bit of cleavage but if your nipple is about to pop out DO NOT wear that top. You should also make sure your butt or underwear is not showing when wearing a dress, skirt, or shorts. You want to look your best, but most importantly you want to be respected and treated like the queen you are. Now I know that men will treat women however they feel but It is known that how you dress can lead to being treated a way you will not like. Your confidence should be the sexiest thing you wear so leave the club attire for the club.

It is important to dress the way you feel most comfortable but remember just because it was made in your size does not mean it looks good on you. Choose your outfit wisely because first impressions are everything. Ask yourself what statement are your trying to make???


***Stay tuned for Full Figured, Fabulous & Dating Part 3: Great Places for Dates next Friday***

Look of The Week

Spring is finally here. Time to pull out those skirts and short sleeve tops. For those who also had snow, you can now pull out your favorite shoes for the warmer weather. Unfortunately it is still snowing here in Central New York so I can't bring out everything just yet. Hopefully I can soon.

For the nicer weather a couple things I love are 1. pencil skirts and 2. peplum tops, so why not put a look together including both. Something many woman are scared to do is mix prints, but that's ok. Mixing and matching a variety of prints is definitely in this season. It gives a more edgy and fun look. That was my inspiration for the Look of The Week. I hope you love it like I do.

Checkerboard Print Pencil Skirt from Asos Curve at $29.93
A.N.A. Floral Half Zip Peplum Top from JCPenney at $18.00
Classic Love Blue Pumps from LolaShoetique at $22.99

FAT...The Angry Description

I was talking with someone a few days ago. She was very upset with someone else and was venting. Now while she was explaining to me why this person made her upset she included the description of her being fat. I understand when people are upset they can say things that could be hurtful. Although that person was not around to hear that, it still made me think.

Usually when you are in a happy/joyful mood you usually would not include fat in the description of someone. What makes us use negative words when we are angry? Calling another person fat is the ultimate hit below the belt. Specially if it is said to someone very insecure about their weight. I can remember growing up and the word fat was enough to make me cry. After many years I became desensitized to it. If I was to be called fat now I would tell them to think of something more clever.

When you are called fat that's usually the only thing they can think of to hurt you. I'm not saying that that person said it to deliberately hurt the other, but it is a word said out of anger. Being angry is followed by negativity. We must understand that calling someone else fat out of anger proves and shows nothing more than what we already see and know. We also must know that to be called fat is something that should be taken lightly. You already know your weight so they didn't say anything to you that you didn't already know. Being called FAT should not be your confidence and self-esteem kyrptonite.

In the world we live in today you have to build tough skin. If being called fat is the worst thing someone can call you then you are in for a rude awakening. When you show people being called fat will not make or break you, they will eventually stop calling you that. Take a stand for yourself and your body. Turn that negative word into a happy one.

Have a FAT and HAPPY day Loves ;)

Loving Your Body Even When You Don't

I love this article by yoga teacher Bethany Eanes, “I Love Yoga, But It Didn’t Help Me Love My Body.” I think that she expresses a common experience of those who are “supposed” to love their bodies–sometimes we don’t. Sometimes, we just aren’t feeling that great about your body. And because we are advocating body love, the subsequent feeling is guilt–feeling guilty for not feeling body love.


Here’s an excerpt from the article that I think captures this issue perfectly:

Here’s the good news: If you don’t fully embrace your body, you are not a failure. You are normal. Body image is extremely complicated on a psychological, emotional and very personal level. There are factors at play every day that can make you feel great in your body or, especially as a woman and especially on certain days of the month, really terrible in your body.

I have practiced yoga for many years now, and I truly live my practice. I meditate. I eat vegetarian. I’m even sober. I go to bed early and wake up before sunrise. I try to breathe deeply into life’s challenges. I aim to live a simple life. But, I still struggle with body image. I still have days when I want to lose weight, even if I rationally realize I don’t need to. And here, friends, is where yoga actually helps.

 

The tendency to struggle with body image is going to happen. The tendency to act on this struggle can be avoided. I may feel fat, ugly, bloated or ready to scream at the scale. But, thankfully, I don’t take the next step. I don’t crash diet. I don’t stop eating carbs for three weeks. I don’t throw up my dinner. (If these are issues you struggle with, my heart goes out to you, and I hope you find a resource for help.)

I echo Bethany’s sentiment here: we defeat the purpose of self-acceptance if we beat ourselves for those times we lack it. We are all works in progress, and a little self-forgiveness goes a long way.

--------------

Everyone has bad days when it comes to loving or even liking there body. It is a day to day process and can be harder for some than others. Don't feel discouraged if you wake up one day and is not happy with the way you look. What we must do is continue to work on ourselves inside and out to gain that love we need.

Article courtesy of www.curvylife.com